630-484-2336 ben@bedo.org

So I’m listening to another coach’s coaching.  It’s part of the MasterFull Mentor Group that I lead (it’s pretty awesome, and you can check it out at www.bedo.org/mentor-group)

The coach was doing a wonderful job, but I kept noticing an interesting thing, so I thought I’d share it with you (confidentially of course).

We discovered this fine line where coaches dance.

On the one hand, we’re not supposed to lead the client, nor tell them what they’re thinking, nor impress out own opinion or knowledge upon them.  It’s all about the Client’s Agenda.

On the other hand, it’s our job (and they come to us for this) to point out the things that we see about them that they cannot.  We have insight, as well as training, that is out of our client’s “box”.  They are counting on us (often) to call out the things that we notice, to offer them new perspectives, to shed insight and light into their habits

So how do you know the difference?

Where’s the line?

Amazingly, it’s all about making powerful assumptions.

To clarify:

If we’re telling the client what we see, and we state it as a fact, “This is how it is” or “this is how you are”, then we’ve stepped out of equal partnership and we’re giving our opinion.  And while it may be an informed and trained opinion, it is an opinion, nonetheness.

However, instead of assuming that what you see is the super-duper truth, we can assume that there IS something there, and then offer it to the client, in partnership.

Asking them what they think or feel about it.

Check in with how they react and receive your information.

Notice how it lands.

You may be right, you may be completely off.  The problem is that we make an assumption and then we automatically believe that what we are sharing is accurate, true and vital.

Yet, by offering it as simply more information, “Just a perspective,” then we are still able to hold the client in their greatness and trust them to be with us on the journey

Anyway, I hope this helps.

It sure made quite an impression in the Mentor Group.

And a new one is beginning next week, Tuesday, September 11 from 11-12 Central.  It’s going to be an amazing coach-growing experience for four amazing coaches.

Will you be one of them?